Courtesy of Brad Pitt: "I'm sorry honey, I love you and I want to marry you, but it just wouldn't be right for us to get married when gay couples are denied that right." Not only can you weasel out of marriage, but you can claim points for being a sensitive social activist at the same time! Probably works better than, "I love you and want to marry you, but as a married couple our combined taxes will go up $5,000 a year."