The Volokh Conspiracy
[Paul Cassell, February 19, 2008 at 3:44pm] Trackbacks
Let the Record Reflect

Here at the law school at Utah, we have a fun student organization called the Jackie Chiles Law Society. Seinfeld fans will recall that Jackie Chiles is the fast-talking lawyer character who appeared several times. The students here use the Society to look at how pop cultural portrays attorneys and whether those portrayals are accurate.

Sometimes, though, truth is stranger than fiction. At their meeting today, the students dug up this You Tube clip that's quite amusing. The lawyer procedes to flip-off the witness several times, ostensibly to test the witness' ability to discern the difference between various hand gestures.

I think the opposing counsel should have inserted, "Let the record reflect ...."

The Ace (mail):
One of the best sitcom characters ever!


Suzie. Call Dr. Bison. Set up an appointment for Mr. Kramer here. Tell him it's from me.
Cosmo Kramer: So, what do you think, Mr. Chiles.
Jackie Chiles: Jackie
Cosmo Kramer: Jackie. I mean, we have a chance?
Jackie Chiles: Do we have a chance? You get me one coffee drinker on that jury, you gonna walk outta there a rich man.


And,

Jackie Chiles: So you're driving in the car, you're with your friend, minding your own business?
Cosmo Kramer: Yeah.
Jackie Chiles: Then what happened?
Cosmo Kramer: Then we saw this woman, and she was wearing a bra with no top.
Jackie Chiles: No top? She didn't have a top on?
Cosmo Kramer: No. So I got distracted and I crashed the car.
Jackie Chiles: Well how would you describe this woman? Would you say she was an attractive woman?
Cosmo Kramer: Oh yeah!
Jackie Chiles: So we got an attractive woman, wearing a bra, no top, walkin' around in broad daylight. She's flouting society's conventions!
Cosmo Kramer: She was flouting.
Jackie Chiles: That's totally inappropriate. It's lewd, vesivius, salacious, outrageous!
2.19.2008 2:56pm
Houston Lawyer:
He was indeed an outstanding character. The lawyer talking guy that Phil Hartman did for the Simpsons was also excellent. Wilford Brimley was awesome in Absence of Malice.
2.19.2008 3:12pm
Cactus Jack:
Jackie Chiles couldn't carry Wayne Jarvis's briefcase.
2.19.2008 3:19pm
wuzzagrunt (mail):
Law schools ought to teach Perry Mason's technique for getting prosecution witnesses to break down and confess, under cross examination. Mad Magazine did a great spoof on that 2 or 3 (or 40) years ago.
2.19.2008 3:25pm
Scott Scheule (mail) (www):
Not to mention Bob Loblaw. That man is a mouthful!
2.19.2008 3:27pm
tarheel:

The lawyer talking guy that Phil Hartman did for the Simpsons was also excellent.

Jackie Chiles is fine, but Lionel Hutz is the lawyer we all aspire to be.

"Would it surprise you to learn that (struggles to remove his tie) . . . I'm not even wearing a tie! (courtroom gallery gasps in shock)."
2.19.2008 3:44pm
tarheel:
More on Lionel Hutz from Wikipedia:

His legal practice, located in a shopping mall, was named "I Can't Believe It's A Law Firm!" and also offered "expert shoe repair". He often tried to entice potential clients with free gifts, including a "smoking monkey" doll and a business card that "turns into a sponge when you put it in water."
2.19.2008 3:47pm
David M. Nieporent (www):
Cases won in 30 minutes or your pizza's free!
2.19.2008 3:56pm
Bender (mail):
The witness in the YouTube clip is so obnoxious I wish the prosecutor had spent more time flipping him the bird. If it was a jury trial the jerk probably got slammed. I wish there were some way of finding out.
2.19.2008 4:52pm
tarheel:
And lest we forget Phil Hartman's greatest work in the legal field -- unfrozen caveman lawyer.
2.19.2008 4:54pm
pete (mail) (www):
"Lionel Hutz, court-appointed attorney. I'll be defending you on the charge of...murder one? Wow! Even if I lose, I'll be famous!"
2.19.2008 4:54pm
Waldensian (mail):
"The Simpsons: Marge Gets a Job (#4.7)" (1992)

Lionel Hutz: Mrs. Simpson, you're in luck. Your sexual harassment suit is exactly what I need to help rebuild my shattered practice. Care to join me in a belt of scotch?

Marge: It's 9:30 in the morning.

Lionel Hutz: Yeah, but I haven't slept in days.
2.19.2008 5:27pm
Daniel Chapman (mail):
I've always been partial to Harvey Birdman - Attorney at Law
2.19.2008 5:55pm
BU2L:
To quote my Evidence SparkChart:

Judge: Mr. Hutz we've been in here for four hours. Do you have any evidence at all?

Lionel Hutz: Well, Your Honor. We've plenty of hearsay and conjecture. Those are kinds of evidence.
2.20.2008 9:56am
hattio1:
BTW,
If the "let the record reflect...." refers to what I think it does, it was actually the judge.
2.20.2008 5:40pm

PicoSearch
Help