The Volokh Conspiracy

Volokh Conspiracy Caption Contest:


Submit your proposed caption in the comment thread.
Yuiop:
You were born in Kenya?!?!
1.14.2009 8:35pm
mainfloorguy:
"Looks like handgun makers have held up well in this recession. Who knew?!?!"
1.14.2009 8:41pm
Brett:
"If you nominate Larry Tribe, I will hunt you down where you live."
1.14.2009 8:41pm
Dixie Yid (mail) (www):
Scalia on the right, Ginsburg on the left... I honestly never thought I'd find myself in the middle!
1.14.2009 8:42pm
Allen Asch (mail) (www):
Centrist Obama Finds Room to Maneuver Between Justices Scalia and Ginsburg
1.14.2009 8:43pm
NaG (mail):
"I read your article for the Harvard Law Review. Sucked."
1.14.2009 8:43pm
CDR D (mail):
Scalia on the right, Ginsburg on the left...

Damn!! You beat me to it!!!

I would add, the black guy in the back.
1.14.2009 8:45pm
GeneralObvious:
"So, Nino, do YOU know what it's like to be a 'young, teenage mom'?"
1.14.2009 8:46pm
TerrencePhilip:
"A brief scene erupted in Washington today as President-elect Obama was temporarily separated from his security detail by a band of seniors rushing to make last call for the early-bird special at a Luby's Cafeteria."
1.14.2009 8:49pm
MikeS (mail):
"No, Justice Scalia, I missed 24 last night..."
1.14.2009 8:53pm
NTB24601:
i can has ginzburger
1.14.2009 9:00pm
trapper 12:
"Did you hear the one about the Italian, the Negro, and the Jew?"
1.14.2009 9:03pm
BRM:
The final picture taken of the late President Elect before he inadvertently stepped into the gravitational vortex formed between the jurisdictional poles of SCOTUS, a star in the Milky Way galaxy. Second later, Mr. Obama vaporized and was never seen again.
1.14.2009 9:09pm
Hello (mail) (www):
The best ones so far
Ginzburger
24
Kenya
1.14.2009 9:10pm
Patrick S. O'Donnell (mail) (www):
And to think, all three of us attended Harvard Law School!

[I know, Justice Ginsburg eventually transferred to Columbia]
1.14.2009 9:14pm
Curt Fischer:
"...this is the column staging area. Hot out of the extruder on from column production area we just came from, the columns cool off here until they are packaged and shipped by rail to Roman-style buildings all around the country and the world. At Columnco over 30% of our business is international...for our foreign customers we ship the columns in specially designed cargo containers..."
1.14.2009 9:15pm
Fub:
"We'rrrrre off to see the Wizard... Oh, wait! I AM the Wizard."
1.14.2009 9:15pm
joe go show:
Well, look, we had to get rid of her, and it was either Foggy Bottom or here. So just count your blessings that Bill likes traveling more than litigating.
1.14.2009 9:21pm
UW3L:
"...Now if it's a manager, that's a different story. Managers know better than to f*ck around, so if you get one that's giving you static, he probably thinks he's a real cowboy, so you gotta break that son of a b*tch in two. ..."
1.14.2009 9:21pm
beat312:
How come you guys aren't wearing your robes?
1.14.2009 9:24pm
The Cabbage (mail):
Why the f$*^! they always gotta make the Black man go last?!
1.14.2009 9:34pm
DiversityHire:
"I dunno BO, if you put him on the court he'll have to stop blogging."
1.14.2009 9:36pm
neurodoc:
Wow, I didn't see much in this picture, but those are some very droll offerings above.

(Who is that in the back talking to Thomas? One of the Supremes? Doesn't look like Alito or Souter, and I think Roberts is the one in front of Ginsburg, next to Stevens? Not sure who is walking on Steven's right either, the guy in front of Scalia.)
1.14.2009 9:39pm
Dave N (mail):
"Now if you had gone the clerkship route, maybe you could have eventually been one of us."
1.14.2009 9:40pm
byomtov (mail):
"On a knockdown there's a mandatory eight-count."

But I like trapper's better.
1.14.2009 9:48pm
krs:
"We put an extra column in the main hall of the Supreme Court. Let's see if Justice Alito notices." *crash* "Nope."

"Whose day is it to watch Justice Souter? I haven't seen him anywhere."

"Now, Barack, you'd better show up next Tuesday so we can just dismiss that Newdow clown's petition as moot."

"Nino, Ruth, if you had to have one of these people as a colleague, who would you pick? Noam Chomsky, Ralph Neas, or Bill Clinton? You have to pick one."
1.14.2009 9:51pm
adam Scales:
"President Obama to Steer Court in New Direction."
1.14.2009 9:52pm
TerrencePhilip:
wow, neurodoc, everyone's a critic!

That is Biden talking with Stevens. Not sure who is in back with Thomas, press reports say "Also on hand were Jeff Minear, counselor to Chief Justice John Roberts Jr., Gregory Craig, Obama's choice for White House counsel, and Alan Hoffman, Biden's deputy chief of staff." So maybe he's one of them.
1.14.2009 9:55pm
Hoosier:
"Now watch this, Senator. When Roberts counts three, we all run behind columns and count how long it takes Stevens to wander off."
1.14.2009 9:56pm
DC-NYC:
"You are *so* lucky McCain conceded."
1.14.2009 9:58pm
BRM:
Souter is standing next to Kennedy and in front of Thomas. Breyer and Alito are the missing justices.
1.14.2009 10:08pm
BJT:
A stroll to the re-packing room.
1.14.2009 10:15pm
Scalia (mail):
I admit we really screwed up Bush v. Gore. But, hey, thanks to us--and Bush--you got elected, Barack.
1.14.2009 10:19pm
merevaudevillian:
"Just need to stay as far away from Joe as possible... I hope he hasn't read my memoirs."
1.14.2009 10:21pm
rc:
Ancient powers lurk, deep in the Mines of Moria.
1.14.2009 10:25pm
rc:
Deep in the Mines of Moria, ancient powers lurk.
1.14.2009 10:26pm
Snaphappy:
The Nine meet The One.
1.14.2009 10:32pm
Snaphappy:
"So tell me about your Muslim faith."
1.14.2009 10:33pm
glangston (mail):
Yes, I think we can find some money in the bailout for you.
1.14.2009 10:44pm
TIU:
Obama to Scalia: Thank you for Bush v. Gore
1.14.2009 10:45pm
Justice Gimli:
Deep in the Mines of Moria: "Stay close to Gandalf."
1.14.2009 10:49pm
rastajenk (mail):
Smoke Break!
1.14.2009 10:55pm
Fedya (www):
"I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching to Geico."
1.14.2009 10:56pm
Andrew Hamilton (mail):
Weren't those columns on our left just now?
1.14.2009 10:58pm
Chris C.:
This would be the last time he accepted an invitation to Denny's without preconditions.
1.14.2009 10:59pm
Jack Black (mail):
Ginsburg: Of course. We all do.
Scalia: We all what?
Obama: Hate Tony Kennedy.
1.14.2009 11:02pm
BGates:
Desperate for Obama's attention, Justice Ginsburg starts to Riverdance.
1.14.2009 11:03pm
Michael B (mail):
"The dinner at Will's place? BYOB, hamburgers, chips, talked up some sports and girls."
1.14.2009 11:07pm
Romach (mail) (www):
"Where's Waldo?"
1.14.2009 11:07pm
BGates:
Souter:Wow, is his ass tight. It's not weird that I'm looking, is it? He's right in front of me. Dang it! Look at something else, look at something else....
1.14.2009 11:08pm
Matt_T:
Scalia: "Well, Barack, the truth is we all like Clarence Thomas very much and race hasn't been an issue. He walks behind us in case Anita Hill decides to vigorously exercise her Second Amendment right. You wouldn't believe the effect Heller had on the wagers in our annual dead pool!"
1.14.2009 11:11pm
gandolf:
"One does not simply walk into Mordor."
1.14.2009 11:14pm
Some Dude:
"...but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night."
1.14.2009 11:29pm
Roy S:
[Flashing Drudge Siren-Light Icon] "WaPo: Underpaid Justices Moonlight on Obama Security Detail."
1.14.2009 11:37pm
Roy S:
[Flashing Drudge Siren-Light Icon] "WaPo: Underpaid Justices Moonlight on Obama Security Detail."
1.14.2009 11:37pm
gran habano:
"OK Barak, we saw that foolish interview you did... and you just remember... NOTHING is above OUR pay grade."
1.14.2009 11:40pm
Stevie Ray (mail):
Can you park my car barack
1.14.2009 11:51pm
kiniyakki (mail):
"Judicial pay is so low that Ruth had to cut the bottom off her bathrobe and start wearing it to court."

Thomas: "I'm totally going to grab his ass this time ... damn, he looked. Oh well, maybe later, I'm going to go eat a cheeseburger."

"So agreed, you guys all take a fall on and give me a 9-0 on your next case, and I'll give you a cut of my winnings."
1.14.2009 11:58pm
Yeah (mail):
Government for the people, by the people.
1.15.2009 12:03am
AndrewK (mail):
Operation Human Shield
1.15.2009 12:09am
BlackX (mail):
All your case are belong to us.
1.15.2009 12:11am
Redlands (mail):
NaG, hilarious.
1.15.2009 12:12am
John Moore (www):
"Lawyers, A Love Story"
1.15.2009 12:14am
Timothy Sandefur (mail) (www):
"And if you like that, we even have different kinds of deference...."
1.15.2009 12:15am
mls (www):
"Nino, I hear the salads aren't so good at this place. Try the bacon doublecheeseburger."
1.15.2009 12:20am
Jay Phillips:
your what limits my what, Nino?!?
Not if you read it right, guys...
1.15.2009 12:32am
Glenn W. Bowen (mail):
Scalia: Don't listen to her, listen to me- she's just a typical white woman, B.O.
1.15.2009 12:40am
Joe McDermott (mail):
Look, Barack, you've got to do something about the creamed corn in the cafeteria. Thomas' gas is about to drive me futher into a come.
1.15.2009 1:02am
resh (mail):
"Even if you were a bevy of platonic guardians, which you most certainly are not."
1.15.2009 1:02am
R:
"Obama! Look at the wax build-up on those shoes! This is fine leather! I want that wax stripped off! I want them creamed and buffed with a fine chamois. And I want them now! Chop chop!"
1.15.2009 1:09am
R:
Scalia: "You don't keep score? Then how do you measure yourself against other candidates?

Obama : "By height."
1.15.2009 1:15am
ColumEx (mail) (www):
"So Nino, Ruthie, tell me seriously: you had Clarence's vocal chords removed, didn't you?"
1.15.2009 2:00am
LM (mail):
"Yeah, everyone assumes since I'm a two guard, Ruthie must play the point. Actually she's all above-the-rim, in-your-face intimidation. Think LeBron with a mean streak.

And her kreplach is to die for."
1.15.2009 2:17am
Peter F. (mail):
"Conservatives to the right of me, liberals to the left, here I am, stuck in the middle again."
1.15.2009 2:23am
Putting Two and Two...:
"Sure, Antonin, we can go turkey hunting whenever you want..."
1.15.2009 2:35am
fortyninerdweet (mail):
"The Master and his Nine Disciples"
1.15.2009 2:59am
Lewis Maskell (mail):
I think you need a change, perhaps we should paint the columns pink
1.15.2009 4:46am
NickM (mail) (www):
"We're walking. We're walking."


Nick
1.15.2009 5:45am
themighthypuck (mail):
You'll get a kick out of this: my daughter wants to name the dog Nino.
1.15.2009 7:06am
David Warner:
Ideological Fraternity Rush
1.15.2009 7:30am
TCO:
*Bonk* Shi...who put that pillar there!?
1.15.2009 7:54am
strangenh:
"And here we are at the Court."
"This is a very large room."
"Uh, yes it is. What is your current thinking on the financial crisis?"
"As long as the roots are not severed, all is well. And all will be well in the garden."
1.15.2009 8:16am
Prof. S. (mail):
"Well, no, when we were first nominated, none of us thought we'd have to moonlight as Secret Service guards, but have you seen our paychecks lately? How are we suppose to feed our families on $170k?"
1.15.2009 8:26am
Happyshooter:
"One of these things is not like the others, one of these things...."
1.15.2009 8:40am
Go Horns!:
"No matter how much Roberts insists, do not pull his finger"

"I was wondering if y'all could help me out, I only have a four year lease, and the owner has an option for another four, but what I would really like to do is buy the place"
1.15.2009 8:45am
JCD (mail):
"It's actually a bet the 8 of us have with Stevens, that we can cut the load by one case per term...."
1.15.2009 9:08am
sham-wow:
Anyone wanna go upstairs for some 5-on-5 shirts v. skins?
1.15.2009 9:09am
skyywise (mail):
"So, do you think my plan to follow Taft's career path is viable?"
1.15.2009 9:11am
Jeffery Earl (mail):
Hey, you like hide and seek? You should come over some night ... we love to play hide and seek in here.
1.15.2009 9:13am
Richard Nieporent (mail):
Black? Black? Nobody told me I was supposed to wear black!
1.15.2009 9:43am
Dixie Yid (mail) (www):
Prof. Kerr,

I'm curious what struck you in particular about the picture that motivated you to make this post...
1.15.2009 9:50am
Whadonna More:
"That's either the sound of Hugo Black spinning in his grave or Augusta National's lawyers tripping over each other in the rush to file thier briefs."

"So a Catholic, a Jew and a black guy go into a are admitted to the bar..."
1.15.2009 9:54am
Scott T:
Look to your left and look to your right because one of you won't be here by the end of your term.
1.15.2009 9:59am
David Cohen:
"No, there's no textual reason you can't nominate yourself."
1.15.2009 10:19am
Jim at FSU (mail):
Historic photo of Clarence Thomas talking.
1.15.2009 10:25am
Christine Hurt (mail) (www):
So, Barack -- have you ever thought we might need a Vice-Chief Justice? I think it would be a good idea, and I've made some sketches of what the robe should look like.
1.15.2009 10:47am
Fishes Eddie (mail) (www):
A Jew, an Italian and a Black walk into the Supreme Court....
1.15.2009 11:11am
Rock Chocklett:
So, I guess he's still mad I said I wouldn't have nominated him, huh?
1.15.2009 11:12am
Hoosier:
sham-wow:
Anyone wanna go upstairs for some 5-on-5 shirts v. skins?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
1.15.2009 12:03pm
Hoosier:
"And this, Mr. Obama, is how we know that sheep bladders can be used to prevent earthquakes."

"This new learning astounds me, Sir Nino!"
1.15.2009 12:07pm
Thales (mail) (www):
Scalia: I tried for eight years to explain to him that Cheney isn't his boss, but he just wouldn't listen.

What?

I know, I know, you used to teach the stuff too.

So, packing any heat in the White House? It's legal now, isn't that cool!
1.15.2009 1:48pm
dearieme:
Where are the other three?
1.15.2009 1:49pm
Andrew Hyman (mail) (www):
Pedestrians scuff up shiny floor.
1.15.2009 2:23pm
Mt Lassen (mail):
Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right.
Here I am, stuck in the middle with you...
1.15.2009 2:44pm
Matt_T:
Historic photo of Clarence Thomas talking.

I got quite a laugh reading this.
1.15.2009 3:06pm
Anon321:
Sammie and Stevie are still taking a steam, but they'll meet us at Fridays for happy hour. They usually split the Parmesean-Crusted Sicilian Quesadillas ...
1.15.2009 3:14pm
Joey Plummer (mail):
So, Mr President-Elect, what do you think of 'Earth, Wind, and....'(to self: what the devil is the name of that group...)...
1.15.2009 4:17pm
ZeroL (mail) (www):
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:

In a bizarre display of executive power, President-elect Barack Obama nominates self to Supreme Court bench as 10th justice. Other self-appointments include Manager for the minor league baseball team Charleston Riverdogs, superintendent of a D.C., Jewish recreational center, and perhaps most bizarre, "tsar" of the defunct british-colony of Rhodesia. Calls to the Office of the President-elect were not immediately returned.
1.15.2009 4:18pm
methodact:
"There's this pool..."
1.15.2009 6:08pm
VanessaU:
This would be the last time he accepted an invitation to Denny's without preconditions.

"No you two, it's not Lenny's it's DENNY's"
1.15.2009 6:25pm
josh:
So ... guys ... I got this election coming up in four years ...
1.16.2009 12:07pm
Jam:
Dang, I thought waiting lines existed only for the ladies bathroom!
1.16.2009 1:44pm
Jam:
Barrak to Thomas: Speed-up man. We are no longer have to be at the back of the bus.
1.16.2009 1:47pm
Denizens Arranger:
Have I told you how great I am? What about my pecs, have you seen my pecs?
1.16.2009 3:42pm
mooglar (mail):
Unknown White Guy/Anakin: "Aren't you coming, Master?"

Obi-Wan/C. Thomas: "No, I'm not brave enough for politics. Today Ginsburg and Scalia are the heroes and they deserve their glorious day with the politician."
1.16.2009 5:01pm
Javert:
"How would you like three more colleagues"?
1.18.2009 11:07am
NoStudentsAllowed (mail):
"Holy sh!t Nino, do you hear that? Coming from the back? Thomas is talking."
1.18.2009 7:14pm
Doug Buck (mail):
Uh, yes; as a matter of fact, many, uh, of my best friends ARE, uh, italian jews.
1.19.2009 9:23pm

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