Rootin' Tootin' Rasputin
Alexander "Sasha" Volokh

A song of Imperial intrigue to the tune of "YMCA"

Young man -- I once worked for the Tsar
In his palace -- I was quite a big star
'Cause I'm holy -- and I thought I'd go far;
The Tsarina loved me 'cause her

Young man -- who was heir to be king,
All the doctors -- couldn't stop his bleedíng;
My hypnosis -- people thought was the thing
That could cure his hemophilia --

I once controlled R-U-S-S-I-A,
Thanks to the T-S-A-R-I-N-A,
I'm not combing my hair,
I'm carousing 'round town,
'Cause I'm friends with the folks with the crown

(And I'm a) hung man -- so I slept with the Queen,
But they killed me -- back in 1916,
Alan Rick-man -- played my part on the screen
In a made-for-TV movie --

Some man -- said, "For the wrong guys you're rootin';
You're a dead man -- if your name's Greg Rasputin,"
And they drowned me -- so I sank as per Newton
In St. Petersburg's fine river --

It's fun to drown in the N-E-V-A,
After you're shot in the B-A-C-K,
Then the Bolsheviks came,
And they did those bad men in
So I got my revenge thanks to Lenin --

I once controlled R-U-S-S-I-A,
Thanks to the T-S-A-R-I-N-A... [fade]

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