Planets:

The recent discovery of another Pluto-sized object orbiting the Sun brings up the question: Is Pluto even a Real Planet, in which case this new one has a similar claim to planethood (planetosity?), or is it merely one of thousands of minor-planet poor stepchildren of the solar system? And this brings up one of my favorite arguments on the subject, which I noted in 2002:

ALWAYS A PLANET TO ME (to the tune of Billy Joel’s “She’s Always A Woman to Me”)

He can orbit the sun, he can look like a moon
He can leave the ecliptic from April to June
He’ll be just a faint smudge, magnitude twenty-three
He hides in the sky, but he’s always a planet to me

Ohhh…a potato-shaped ball…
He can drift where he wants
He’s a relic of time
Ohhh…if he’s made of pure ice
Or of vapor and dust
It’s the same to my mind

If he zooms in near us, would he show us a tail?
Was the Kuiper Belt once the great home whence he sailed?
And if he gets demoted, who’ll be next, Mercury?
And the most he can do is cast shadows, it’s true
But he’s always a planet to me

[Attributed to Steven DeRose, Chief Scientist, Brown Univ. Scholarly Technology Group; if anyone has reason to doubt this attribution, and can suggest a more accurate one, please let me know.]

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