I like many Christmas songs (mostly the religious ones); Silent Night, Holy Night, for instance, is superb. But hands-down my absolutely positively most loathed Christmas song is Winter Wonderland. I mean, rhyming “snowman” with … “Mr. Snowman”? “Gone away is the bluebird / Here to stay is a new bird”? “Conspire … to face unafraid …”? Yuck.
In any case, that’s my candidate for Worst Christmas Song; what’s yours?
Laura(southernxyl) says:
The year “Santa Baby” came out I thought it was cute the first 4,396 times I heard it. After that, not so much.
If I can mention a second one, “All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth” sets mine on edge.
December 15, 2009, 8:22 pmDan Simon says:
“Good King Wenceslas”. Utterly irredeemable.
December 15, 2009, 8:29 pmEric Rasmusen says:
“The Little Drummer Boy” aggravates me. It is mythical and sentimental, and the repetition of “pa rum pa pom pom” is inane.
December 15, 2009, 8:31 pmBT says:
Someone did a great parody of this song that included the line, walkin’ round in women’s underwear.
December 15, 2009, 8:56 pmRichard Gould-Saltman says:
At least there’s enough room to pick.
Two worst Hannukkah songs?
Same as the two best Hannukkah songs! There ARE ONLY two Hannukah songs!
Heck, the state of Hannukkah songs is so bad, Adam Sandler’s is a serious contender for the “favorite” spot, and we’ve got a MORMON volunteering to help out with a new Hannukah song, ’cause he feels bad for the Jews!
Of cours, ol’ Israel Baline was busy writing a little ditty called “White Christmas”, and so we didn’t have the best talent available for part of the last century…
December 15, 2009, 8:56 pmcorneille1640 says:
“I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus”
December 15, 2009, 8:57 pmLaura(southernxyl) says:
But I do that every day.
coneille, I’ve blocked that one.
December 15, 2009, 8:59 pmkdackson says:
The only thing worse than “Winter Wonderland” is….
Winter Wonderland – The PC Version. You know the one where they replace:
In the meadow we will build a snowman
And pretend he is Parson Brown
He’ll say, “Are you married?”
We’ll say “No man, but you can do the job if you’re in town.”
with:
In the meadow we will build a snowman
And pretend he’s a circus clown
He’ll say, “Are you married?”
We’ll say “No man, but you can do the job if you’re in town.”
Because, of course, we have to eliminate all potential illusion of any religous theme.
And when does a circus clown get hte power to perform weddings?
Utterly STOOPIT
And, for the record, I’m an athiest.
December 15, 2009, 9:05 pmBill N says:
If you’re put off by “Santa Baby,” how about her “I’m Gettin’ Nuttin’ for Christmas“:
I’m getting nothing for Christmas
Poor little Eartha is sad
I’m getting nothing for Christmas
Cuz I didn’t wanna be bad
Jim promised me a sable coat
Just for a little kiss
A diamond ring and motor boat
Just for a little kiss
He said I’ll buy out the stores
Everything I have is yours
I will be your Santa Claus
Just for a little kiss…
As for worst songs, anything from the Carpenters Chrismas, Barry Manilow, or that Mannheim Steamroller garbage. Blech.
Among my more obscure favorites–Some great tracks from Louis Armstrong–”Christmas Time in New Orleans” and “Christmas Night in Harlem.” And, although not a song, Louis Armstrong reading “‘Twas the Night Before Christmas.” I believe it was the last thing he recorded before he died.
December 15, 2009, 9:24 pmLaura(southernxyl) says:
It was Madonna’s “Santa Baby” that I remember coming out, thankyouverymuch. I was but 3 years old in 1963.
I have also blocked the Carpenters and Barry Manilow. At least Mannheim Steamroller is uptempo.
I like my Brian Setzer CD.
My very favorite Christmas and Advent music is the parts of “The Messiah” that we hear at this time of year. I love it more every time I hear it.
December 15, 2009, 9:30 pmAndy says:
The worst Christmas song of all time, hands down, is “The Christmas Shoes” by NewSong. It is about a child who scrapes together enough money to buy a pair of shoes for his dying mother. The most egregious part, besides all the schmaltz, is this lyric: “Could you hurry, sir, Daddy says there’s not much time / You see she’s been sick for quite a while /
December 15, 2009, 9:31 pmAnd I know these shoes would make her smile / And I want her to look beautiful if Mama meets Jesus tonight.” Do I even need to explain all that is wrong with this?
Albatross says:
Anything by Paul McCartney. Oh, and “Wonderful Christmastime” is pretty bad, too.
December 15, 2009, 9:39 pmDave N. says:
Let’s not forget Grandma Got Runover by a Reindeer.
December 15, 2009, 9:44 pmbyomtov says:
“Jingle Bell Rock?”
December 15, 2009, 9:51 pmBill N says:
Southernxyl: Madonna recorded “Santa Baby”? I’m glad I didn’t know that. And thanks for bringing up “Messiah”–I think that’s the first classical music I heard as a child that opened my ears to the genre.
December 15, 2009, 9:52 pmTom M says:
The Bruce Springsteen version of “Santa Claus is Coming to Town”.
December 15, 2009, 9:54 pmSteveMG says:
White Chrismas.
There was a terrific piece last week in the Wall Street Journal on the history of the song. Originally, Irving Berlin wrote it for a escapist, semi-comedy movie (“Holiday Inn”) about a group of people celebrating Christmas in Hollywood, California. Bing Crosby recorded it in studio in May 1941.
But the scene where he performed the song was filmed after Pearl Harbor and Berlin knew (he waited anxiously behind the stage when the scene was being filmed) that the song would take on a completely different context. “Songs make history”, he said, “But history makes songs.”
History made this song and the song made history.
December 15, 2009, 9:55 pmSteveMG says:
White Chrismas.
I should have said “not White Christmas.”
Yeah, I muddled the topic up a bit but, hey, it’s Christmas and who really cares?
I’ll recover and agree with EV that “Winter Wonderland” is awful.
December 15, 2009, 10:14 pmLTEC says:
They will announce their engagement, and then:
Marriage requires courage. This seems pretty deep to me. And there’s no Jesus. (Granted, the next verse is terrible.)
Here is a list of Christmas CDs I would like to see:
Certainly “White Christmas” would be on all of them.
December 15, 2009, 10:16 pmtheobromophile says:
Agree with “Santa Baby,” which just plain sets my teeth on edge. (It’s so girly-cute but in an inappropriate-for-girls way… yuck!)
Second also McCartney’s “Wonderful Christmastime.” Maybe it’s just that I don’t like whiny Christmas music (or any whiny music, for that matter).
December 15, 2009, 10:38 pmpchuck says:
Tom M: My gauge of whether I will have a good Christmas season and upcoming year is if I successfully avoid hearing Bruce Springsteen’s version of “Santa Claus is Coming to Town”.
George Michael’s “Last Christmas” is horrid.
For modern Christmas songs, Elvis Presley’s “Blue Christmas” is great.
December 15, 2009, 10:43 pmwilliam jones says:
anything not the hippopotamus song.
December 15, 2009, 10:46 pmAlan K. Henderson says:
Anything by Jingle Cats.
I enjoy Weird Al Yankovic’s Christmas at Ground Zero. It helps to be old enough to remember when “ground zero” meant something other than a specific location in NYC.
December 15, 2009, 11:26 pmNR says:
“Wonderful Christmastime” by Paul McCartney.
Honorable mention to “Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer” and “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Clause.”
But I have to admit “The Christmas Shoes” sounds bloody awful.
December 15, 2009, 11:27 pmNR says:
….Okay, it’s “The Christmas Shoes.” Hands down.
Link: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=7vJ3efbyhTE&hl=en&gl=US&client=mv-google
December 15, 2009, 11:39 pmu. saldin says:
I don’t like any of them except for cheesy versions of “Oh Holy Night”.
December 16, 2009, 12:44 amMogden says:
Some winners in here…
December 16, 2009, 12:58 amThe 10 Most Depressing Christmas Songs
Can't find a good name says:
Do I have this right — the founder of The Volokh Conspiracy dislikes a song because it uses the word “conspire”?
Aside to BT: “Walkin’ Round in Women’s Underwear” was recorded by Bob Rivers & Twisted Radio.
December 16, 2009, 1:08 amGrover_Cleveland says:
Eugene: have you heard the Darlene Love/Phil Spector version of “Winter Wonderland”? The huge wash of sound makes you forget about the silly lyrics. In fact, nearly everything on the album is great.
Worst Christmas music: I agree with the earlier commenter who nominated “Good King Wenceslas” and would add “We Three Kings of Orient Are”. Two awful 19th-century creations that somehow survived into the 21st.
December 16, 2009, 1:25 ameyesay says:
We three kings of orient are.
Tried to smoke a rubber cigar.
It was loaded, it exploded … Boom!
We two kings of orient are.
Tried to smoke a rubber cigar.
It was loaded, it exploded … Boom!
I a king of orient are.
Tried to smoke a rubber cigar.
It was loaded, it exploded … Boom!
Silent night!
December 16, 2009, 1:37 amBJR says:
I heard “Wonderful Christmastime” for the first time on the local soft rock radio station this morning. I puked a little in my mouth. Oh Sir Paul. Not a high moment in your career.
December 16, 2009, 1:38 amDavid K says:
That song by Alvin and the Chipmunks, “Christmas Don’t Be Late”, makes my brain want to explode every time I hear it.
I managed retail from the late 70′s into the mid-90′s and near the end managed one store that was part of a chain. Whoever was in charge of the programming for the chain’s piped in music must have really liked “Blue Christmas” by Elvis because they played that song at least 5 or 6 times almost every shift I worked. Now I like Elvis and it’s not a terrible song but I had it drilled into my head so many times that I can’t listen to it without thinking of that store.
Anyway, as a result of my experiences I’ve heard about every Christmas song imaginable performed by multiple artists and Alvin and the Chipmunks top my list.
December 16, 2009, 2:25 amtarylcabot says:
i’ll also vote for “jingle bell rock” in part because some department store had an animatronic santa ‘dancing’ while jingle bell rock played endlessly. finally i turned off santa. the sales clerk thanked me (this was in early november) & stated that she wasn’t allowed to turn off santa herself.
December 16, 2009, 2:57 amBill Poser says:
I don’t know about the worst Christmas song, but the best is the country classic “Grandma got run over by a reindeer”.
December 16, 2009, 3:11 amfishbane says:
White Trash Christmas, by Paranoid Larry.
“Grandma got ran over”, &tc is a close second.
I like the traditionals. They’re good music. I am a bit of a bomb thrower-athiest, and at the least I can agree on that. I even went caroling last year. Don’t think that’s going to happen this year, but I did do Santacon.
December 16, 2009, 4:01 amPersonFromPorlock says:
I consider any year I don’t hear “Jingle Bell Rock” to be a good year. Although there are many runners-up.
December 16, 2009, 6:47 amIlec says:
“The Cat Carol” – utterly depressing song about a cat and a mouse caught outside in a winter storm on Christmas which ends with the cat dying but saving the mouse with its body warmth. I turn the radio off anytime it comes on.
December 16, 2009, 7:19 amLaura(southernxyl) says:
This and the shoe thing, neither of which I’ve heard thank God, have started to make me wonder if they have a point about a “war on Christmas”.
I like Elvis and “Blue Christmas” now but when I was a kid I couldn’t stand it. “I’ll-a have-a-huh buhloooo (hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo)” – I thought, yuk.
Christmas carols recorded by people whose thing they are not. “O Holy Night” is a fine song if every syllable isn’t dragged out until you want to strangle the singer. If you don’t get it, that’s ok, but then don’t record it. Cause I have to hear it on other people’s radios.
On the plus side – anybody who’s sung in a church choir for any period of time has done some of Robert Shaw’s “Many Moods of Christmas”. Great arrangements, lots of fun to sing. We had an orchestral arrangement at college that was fun too.
December 16, 2009, 7:34 amric says:
DOMINIC THE DONKEY….Shoot me please if it comes on…..
New favorite??? Nutcracker Suite by the Brian Setzer Orchestra….Yah baby rock it!!!!
http://www.last.fm/music/The+Brian+Setzer+Orchestra/_/The+Nutcracker+Suite
and their version of Mr. grinch is “suite” as well.
December 16, 2009, 8:10 amLCH says:
I absolutely can not stand “Last Christmas” by Wham. (Of course I’ve never been able to stand anything by Wham.) The lyrics are ridiculous:
Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year to save me from tears
I’ll give it to someone special – special
Oooh baby
December 16, 2009, 8:28 amKevin r says:
Some of these nominees I’ve never heard of, thankfully. The cat one sounds fantastically terrible from the description, I’m half tempted to seek it out to find out just how bad it is.
I’m no fan of Winter Wonderland either.
December 16, 2009, 8:54 amDoh-San says:
“White Christmas”, without a doubt.
Second place goes to “The Little Drummer Boy”.
Certain individuals have actually been known to set down their purchases, leave their place in line, and walk out of the store when “White Christmas” comes on. It’s actually worth losing one’s place in line.
December 16, 2009, 9:03 amConnie says:
A third vote for this one.
Also, what is it with Jews recording Christmas songs? Streisand, Dylan,
etc. I guess, whatever pays the bills.
And honorable mention to Here Comes Santa Claus for tying Santa to Jesus in a subsequent verse.
Whenever I hear “carols at the spinet” in We Need a Little Christmas, I think, “Ah, is she.”
December 16, 2009, 9:28 amJeff says:
Lots of bad ones, but absolutely the best Christmas song is the Mel Blance (Porky Pig) rendition of “Blue Christmas”.
December 16, 2009, 9:35 amPubliusFL says:
Well, Dylan at least did become a Christian, and wrote a fair bit of non-Christmas Christian music as well.
December 16, 2009, 9:55 amKevinM says:
Wouldn’t it make more sense to sing
December 16, 2009, 10:08 amLater on we’ll perspire
As we sit by the fire?
David McCourt says:
Released just as the nominations were closing, “Must be Santa,” sung by Bob Dylan, accompanied by what sounds like a zydeco band and the New Christie Minstrels. Listen here: http://www.rollingstone.com/reviews/album/30361498/review/30455318/christmas_in_the_heart (track # 10). Proof that, however cool you were, if you hang around long enough, you become just another embarrassing old fart.
December 16, 2009, 10:26 amDavid McCourt says:
“Also, what is it with Jews recording Christmas songs?”
Well, the best selling Christmas song — actually, the best selling song, period — “White Christmas,” was written by . . . Irving Berlin.
December 16, 2009, 10:29 amDan Weber says:
I would purposely missing the lyrics your way as a child, because it made more sense to me.
But add my entire family’s vote for “Christmas Shoes.” We get up and change the radio tuned to Christmas music when it comes on. You know the kid is just going to sell the shoes on Ebay anyway.
December 16, 2009, 10:30 amjheath says:
“Twelve Days of Christmas”. I find it much harder to tone out than “Little Drummer Boy,” which is otherwise as bad.
For those who don’t like “White Christmas,” try the Otis Redding recording of it on the Stax-Volt Christmas Album. There are a couple of gems by Solomon Burke on the same album.
December 16, 2009, 10:32 amDavid McCourt says:
My personal choice of detested song is Alvin and the Chipmunks, “Christmas Don’t Be Late.” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2dnrosVyamY
Played night and day for the hardest cases at Gitmo.
December 16, 2009, 10:34 amCory J says:
I also nominate Springsteen’s version of Santa Claus is Coming to Town.
Recently, one of my favorite sportswriter/bloggers, Joe Posnanski, named it as his #2 holiday song of all time! Posnanski loves the Boss, but I figured even fans of his thought that song is terrible.
If any of you check out the post I’m sure many will be pleased to see that the very first comment makes a lawerly argument regarding the distinction between “holiday” and “Christmas” songs.
December 16, 2009, 11:01 amOtto says:
I didn’t know this existed until a couple days ago when it was played on the radio, but “I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas” (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e7xjjlUbpJ4) is way up my list for worst song.
December 16, 2009, 11:06 amDavid McCourt says:
My favorite Christmas Song, since you ask, lovelier even than “Silent Night,” and 200 years older, is “Es ist ein Ros entsprungen,” as sung in this sublime version by the King’s Singers. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rw6yAlHd8C8
Beauty to haunt the heart.
December 16, 2009, 11:46 amHoustonSelgin says:
I may just be a sentimental old fool(40), but I LOVE the Christmas Shoes song (and I have a degree in Music – the classical kind).
Don’t knock White Christmas! I just heard Bing Crosby singing it in the movie Holiday Inn – he has an incredible voice, smooth, without tension, and I don’t have any problem with the lyrics.
Can’t beat Handel’s Messiah. I’ve sung it MANY times, but it never gets old – seems to get better with age – a true masterpiece.
Bad carols – I agree with previous posters – We Three Kings and Drummer Boy are pretty awful. My daughter loves Carol of the Bells, but I can’t stand it!
Favorite carols – Lo How a Rose, In the Bleak Midwinter, Silent Night, Wexford Carol, God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen.
I make extra money this time of year as part of a Victorian caroling quartet, so I have sung many of these multiple times and have had time to gain an appreciation, or DEpreciation, of them over time.
Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah, or whatever suits your fancy this time of year!
December 16, 2009, 11:54 amDarin says:
Comedian Heywood Banks did the parody “walkin’ round in women’s underwear” IT is a great song.
December 16, 2009, 11:55 amGordo says:
My wife’s least favorite Christmas song is on an old Christmas “Living Strings” album and is a medley which includes an alleged Italian Christmas song called “Buon Natale,” and something called “Bossa Nova Noel.” I actually kind of like it.
December 16, 2009, 12:13 pmpchuck says:
I can’t stand the “Twelve Days of Christmas” parody by Bob & Doug McKenzie.
Although I love Bing Crosby, I loathe his duet with David Bowie on “Little Drummer Boy” because it is just creepy.
A few years back I heard “I’ll be a Homo for Christmas” which I thought was funny.
In New Orleans during Mardi Gras they have a version of “Grandma Got Run Over …” entitled “Grandma Got Run Over by a King Float” and it is truly horrible.
As mentioned, I hate Springsteen’s version of “Santa Claus is Coming to Town.” On the other hand, Springsteen’s version of “Merry Christmas Baby” is pretty good for a modern song.
December 16, 2009, 12:29 pmHoustonSelgin says:
Oh, and I almost forgot the best Christmas album of all time – Vince Guaraldi’s Charlie Brown Christmas.
Also, something a little more obscure – Take6 He is Christmas – all a cappella jazz arrangements of classic Christmas songs.
December 16, 2009, 12:49 pmBill Woods says:
You really can’t have Christmas without Christ.
Have a happy Yuletide (or Saturnalia).
Oh, and “The Little Drummer Boy” is the worst.
December 16, 2009, 12:53 pmRailroad Gin says:
Any version of “We Wish You A Merry Chistmas” The ad nauseum repetition of the title is completly inane.
December 16, 2009, 12:56 pmadam says:
i wonder as i wonder:
‘for poor lonely like you and like i‘
um, shouldn’t that be ‘like me’?
December 16, 2009, 1:14 pmDotar Sojat says:
Whatta buncha’ grinches.
December 16, 2009, 1:36 pmChem_geek says:
“It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” has got my vote. Scary ghost stories? However, Staples did somewhat rescue it by using the song in its back-to-school advertising campaigns. (now, if they’d only wait until August, instead of starting them in June…)
December 16, 2009, 1:56 pmbasher20 says:
Favorite: “The Glory of the Lord Shall be Revealed” from Handel’s Messiah, or anything off of the Celtic Woman Christmas album.
Least favorite: “silver Bells”. the song is not about Christmas, it’s about Christmas shopping – two related but very different things
About others mentioned, “Santa Baby” has been the victim of two many cutsey pop-tart arrangements the past few years. It really needs a 2:00 am jazz club torch singer and lean arrangement to pull off successfully.
Hippopotamus for Chistmus can be tolerated at most twice a year.
Blue Christmas Didn’t make sense to me until I spent a Christmas away from home iin in the military.
On that note, if the 82nd Airborne Chorus (yes it exists and is excellent) were to put out a version of “I’ll be home for Christmas”, video of military overseas decorating their hooches and bunkers, they could make millions for the USO or Red Cross. Just Sayin’.
December 16, 2009, 2:34 pmTactful says:
“Christmas Wrapping” by the Waitresses is terrible, but a staple of the retail Muzak holiday channel. It’s a chatter song…
“A&P has provided me /With the world’s smallest turkey
Already in the oven, nice and hot / Oh damn! Guess what I forgot?
So on with the boots, back out in the snow / To the only all-night grocery,
When what to my wondering eyes should appear /In the line is that guy I’ve been chasing all year!”
Etc…
December 16, 2009, 2:40 pmSeamus says:
I took it as proof that, Christian or not, Bob’s still doing drugs.
December 16, 2009, 2:50 pmSeamus says:
Is “Winter Wonderland” really a Christmas song at all? Yes, I know that it’s played ad nauseam all through December, which shows that the people programming the radio stations and the public address systems obviously think it’s a Christmas song. But it never mentions Christmas, only snow and winter. Where I come from (Northern Virginia), snow has very little to do with Christmas, and is far more typical of January or even later months, by which time Christmas has become nothing but a bunch of old credit card bills.
December 16, 2009, 3:00 pmJasonB says:
“I Believe in Father Christmas” by Greg Lake or possibly “Don’t They Know It’s Christmas.” Any song with a lyric like “Well tonight thank God it’s them instead of you” is just ugly. Only rich celebrities could write songs designed to make middle class people feel bad at Christmas.
December 16, 2009, 3:12 pmFedya says:
The Bruce Springsteen version of anything.
December 16, 2009, 3:33 pmAlissa says:
“Wonderful Christmastime” – I have to turn off the radio every time I hear it. Second place goes to “Little Drummer Boy”.
December 16, 2009, 3:37 pmFedya says:
Am I the one person who likes “Wonderful Christmastime”? Sure, the lyrics are a bit silly and the music is late-70s synth, but it’s fun. It’s a hell of a lot better than John Lennon’s “Happy Christmas (War Is Over)” dirge, which is almost as bad as “Imagine”, and makes me want to run from the room screaming in horror.
(Then again, I think John Lennon is overrated in general….)
December 16, 2009, 3:44 pmAJB says:
http://www.nixonthehand.com/2009/11/19/creepy-grim-reaper-comes-to-christmas-party/
I love Dylan but this is just a trainwreck (song and unsettling video). I agree w/ all the comments below the video.
December 16, 2009, 3:47 pmRandom Wine Geek says:
It’s hard to pick the worst from a list that includes “Wonderful Christmastime,” “Santa Baby,” and “Jingle Bell Rock.” I’d actually support a constitutional amendment criminalizing the performance of these songs without written consents from any person within the audible range of the performance (which, to avoid inadvertently subjecting anyone to these atrocities, would be defined as the greatest distance at which the performance could be detected by any vertebrate).
I blame the ubiquity of these songs during the Christmas season on businesses, particularly retailers, willing to play Christmas music as long as it won’t offend a patron’s sensibilities by including a religious theme.
I enjoy the trite Little Drummer Boy in limited doses for some reason. Britton’s Ceremony of Carols, Handel’s Messiah, “O Come, O Come, Emmanuel,” “Coventry Carol,” and “What Child is This” top my list of seasonal favorites, though.
December 16, 2009, 6:47 pmThe misery of Christmas songs « Entitled to an Opinion says:
[...] I first started thinking about it when the subject was brought up at Occluded Sun. Then Eugene Volokh brought up the larger subject of worst Christmas songs, regardless of depressive intent. One of the [...]
December 16, 2009, 9:14 pmDoh-San says:
The only acceptable versions of “Santa Baby” are the ones by Helen “Betty Boop” Kane and Jane Krakowski (of “Ally McBeal” fame).
December 16, 2009, 10:16 pmBleepless says:
Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer.
December 16, 2009, 10:20 pmBy the way, should you be interested in bad music in general, try the website Miserable Melodies.
Syd Henderson says:
“Hooray for Santa Claus” from the movie Santa Claus Conquers the Martians is fiendishly addictive and sometimes worms its way in and out of my brain for weeks at a time. The movie as a whole is proof that true evil exists in the world.
Here are the lyrics: http://www.fleajumper.com/songs/txt/Hooray%20For%20Santy%20Claus.txt
December 16, 2009, 11:05 pmAnd here’s a performance.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M-TGnBOZj1U&feature=related
David McCourt says:
“The only acceptable versions of “Santa Baby” are the ones by Helen “Betty Boop” Kane….”
But the only acceptable Betty Boop is the one on offer here, in distinctly un-Christmas fare:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHqjMhD04uA
December 16, 2009, 11:07 pmtheobromophile says:
Fedya: personally, I don’t enjoy the sensation of having my ears bleed, but to each his own. If I wanted “fun” Christmas music, I would head for the Beach Boys.
When I was a kid, I loved Snoopy’s Christmas (by the Royal Guardsmen). That qualifies as fun, albeit not in an adult way.
December 17, 2009, 12:29 amAlan K. Henderson says:
Is that any stranger than atheists recording Christmas songs? John Lennon…er…okay, maybe just one atheist. Unless someone’s got a video of Christopher Hitchens singing “Hark the Herald Angels Sing” at the karaoke machine.
December 17, 2009, 12:34 amtheobromophile says:
Basher: then I take it that you don’t like Roy Orbison’s Pretty Paper, either.
December 17, 2009, 12:45 amrequired says:
It never fails, every 6 or 7 years when I finally get to the point where I can stand to hear Father Christmas by The Kinks again, some radio station “discovers” it and overplays it to the point where I want to run screaming when I hear it for the 50th time in one day. Fortunately I’ve never had my favorite Christmas song (Fairy Tale of New York by The Pogues) subjected to the overplay which makes me detest a song. I have to agree that Santa Baby is the most offensive right now but I doubt it will have the continuous rediscovery that has ruined Father Christmas for me.
Oh and Alan K Anderson, John Lennon wasn’t an atheist, he was a Buddhist when he wrote the song. Admittedly having a Buddhist singing a Christmas song sounds strange, but think how many of the great Christmas songs were written by Jews (in fairness Judaism has to take the blame for Santa Baby as well).
December 17, 2009, 4:09 amDavid McCourt says:
Alan K Henderson,
You’ve attached my name to something I did not say. Please attribute the quote to the correct person.
December 17, 2009, 8:22 amFantasiaWHT says:
Happy Christmas (War is Over) – Those children make my ears bleed.
December 17, 2009, 10:01 amRick Sincere says:
John Denver’s “classic” song “Please Daddy (Don’t Get Drunk at Christmas)” definitely deserves mention here. It really sums up the best (?) of the season.
December 17, 2009, 12:05 pmDotar Sojat says:
Basher – when I was in, the 82d chorus was also the LRRP platoon. Tough choir.
December 17, 2009, 12:53 pmAlan K. Henderson says:
Sorry, that was Connie.
December 17, 2009, 1:30 pmBill says:
I agree with the others, “Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time” (featuring the Rita Rudner parody of “The Best of Linda McCartney” album playing the keyboard with the keys marked with the big X) makes me want to ban Christmas and the invention of the Radio. Then there are the Dogs barking “Jingle Bells”, but that’s marginally forgivable since they were doing that one on purpose. “Grandma got run over” is only acceptable if it’s done by the Irish Rovers (who got the airplay on Dr Demento before Elmo and Patsy took over the lion’s share of the airplay).
Then again, I’m the one that was banished to the couch the night I played the Arrogant Worm’s “Santa’s gonna kick your ass” at her christmas party.
December 17, 2009, 1:59 pmBill Poser says:
Required@Buddhists are atheists. Buddhism recognizes the existence of intelligent beings different from and in some ways superior to human beings, which one may characterize as deities, but all are subject to the purely mechanical operation of the laws of the universe. There is no Supreme Being with magical powers.
December 18, 2009, 1:27 amSteve says:
One of my favorite parts of Christmas is the music and when I commute I listen to a radio station that plays Christmas music 24 hours a day from Thanksgiving through Christmas. Unfortunately, their playlist can’t be more than 100 songs. Some of the marginal (Don’t They Know Its Christmas) or cutesy songs (Grandma) that have already been mentioned get old after hearing them every day. But nothing is worse than Christmas Shoes. I turn the radio off when they play it.
December 20, 2009, 2:52 amThe Volokh Conspiracy » Blog Archive » Sunday Song Lyric says:
[...] know Eugene’s least favorite Christmas song, but what’s your favorite? I agree with Eugene that Silent Night, Holy Night is “suberb.” [...]
December 20, 2009, 8:49 amAdam Kamp says:
Christmas songs:
They’ve been mentioned already, but every time my wife and I hear “LAst Christmas” or “Wonderful Christmastime” we look at each other and start to twitch uncontrollably.
Bill Poser:
I’m pretty sure that a religion that includes deities (as at least Mahayana might be considered to) wouldn’t be “atheism,” regardless of the extent to which such deities are still ruled by the laws of the universe. Otherwise, animism/animatism would be a form of atheism.
December 20, 2009, 11:07 amkimsch says:
The Christmas Shoes. What is this dirty, unkempt kid doing all alone at the shoe store (at the mall)? Why isn’t he with his mother at home or the hospital or hospice if she’s so close to dying? Why should he be concerned about buying a pair of Manolo’s or Louis Vuitton’s for a woman on death’s door? Hey kid, listen, Jesus doesn’t care if mom’s even wearing shoes let alone “pretty” ones when he greets her. She’ll be beautiful to Him no matter what. It’s a waste of money to buy the shoes. And the singer shouldn’t have wasted his money either. If the kid is dirty and unkempt, the money could be better spent on clothes or food for the kid.
/rant off
December 20, 2009, 2:47 pmThales says:
Sleigh Ride with lyrics; it’s okay performed instrumentally.
December 21, 2009, 11:51 amVader says:
Worst Christmas song?
Y’all have brought forward many worthy candidates, but none can compare with “Do They Know It’s Christmas/Feed The World”.
It’s so awful, you can’t even make an amusing parody of it. Though having Alvin and the Chipmunks sing it might be an improvement.
December 21, 2009, 1:57 pmAmy says:
I agree and have for a long time. I always thought that somewhere out there a child really was facing the possibility of losing a parent on Christmas Eve. Little did I know that I would be facing that prospect. Years ago, while I was at the hospital wondering if my father would be leaving there alive, all I could think of was that awful song. Thank God he is still with us today, but it was touch and go. And I can’t comprehend why many people think there is something heartwarming about this. They even made it into a TV movie!
December 22, 2009, 5:36 pm